Tag: friendships

kids and poetry

~ Tanmay ~ Leave a comment

Been a busy three days tending to poetic desires. It is a relief to know that if you keep your head down and put in the work, it’ll pay off.

Writing has offered a steady support for a long time. It’s an exercise that if done for pleasure will furnish peace. There’s endless possibilities of the magic that can be crafted through pen and paper. Once an idea strikes I translate it into an image, and I describe it as best as possible. Slowly I feel that the poem itself dictates how it’ll turn out to be and I am just a medium.

There’s a lot of exploration to do and I will keep sharing what I find as I find it.

-Tanmay

unread stuff

~ Tanmay ~ Leave a comment

I bought a hardcover box set of The Lord of The Rings, with the whole series divided into 7 small books. The set looks extremely sexy, it’s inviting and the blue and gold colours exude a sense of peace.

All that said I haven’t actually gotten to reading more than 80 pages of the first book. Tolkien is a genius but man he definitely takes his time to get to the point. It seems he’s screaming and laughing at us: “I have the goddamn luxury of time!”

What’s also awesome is the fact that he was friend with the writer of The Chronicles of Narnia, C. S. Lewis. It is said they both wanted to write fantasy and encouraged each other.

But I’ll get around to reading it, I’m sure. It is one of those books that should be read before your life is over.

-Tanmay

buried alive; logic; reasons

~ Tanmay ~ Leave a comment

Music and loneliness have a symbiotic relationship. Music doesn’t cut away the loneliness but it sure numbs the pain that arises out of it. I remember in my second semester at univeristy I had my earphones resting on my ears constantly, no matter where I went. In February 2018 I was introduced to Logic’s Under Pressure by a fellow music enthusiast and music producer. I fell in love with Logic instantly. He is revered by a lot of people for his honest take on anxiety and depression, almost as if an older brother is listening to you and your fears. I remember sitting alone for breakfast eating quickly whilst listening to Buried Alive, the memory is etched so clearly that listening to the song again now brings back images from that time and a thump in my body because of the physiological changes that anxiety brought forth were sometimes more pronounced while listening to relatable music. It was mostly a wrenching of the gut- up and down so strong that it would force my hip up if I was on my bed.

There was a dependence that I fostered on certain types of music that helped channel some of my confusion with life into energy to get up and do shit. I owe a lot to the artists whose music I listened to then. The desperation of loneliness demands prompt attachment to anything constant. People couldn’t be there in the way I needed them to be, so an only child was still the only child at steel tables, with two hundred of his peers ten meters away. It was almost necessary, the way my life unfolded then; it made me impervious.

Everything happens for a reason and the reason is made clear after the happening; almost always.

-Tanmay

blues and hairstreaks + ants

~ Tanmay ~ Leave a comment

Sustainability in relationships is surprising especially where there was not general bonhomie before. We make friends with a diverse group of people as we grow older and find ourselves moving in even more diverse circles professionally and socially. There are multiple studies investigating why people become friends but they’re based on probability and statistics, which render certain scientific-evidence-based overview of friendships, but I don’t believe many of us would tamper with the existing social and emotional dynamic with the people we love and cherish and put scientific labels on it.

There are some friendships based solely on the fact that the two people share one similar interest and thus they have their paths cross at those points in their life which also coincide with the execution of such interests. There are those friendships that go beyond a mono-focused interest or activity base, rather the emotional bond percolates more aspects of personal life of both the friends to the extent that important decisions which alter the lives of people are influenced too.

I have been blessed to have a few such deep relationships with people from both the aforementioned categories (there are more, however in my experience it is broadly divided in the two). It isn’t so from the very first day you meet them though. I can clearly remember my initial years at school where my introvertedness was at a peak and I had fewer friends than the fingers on my hand. The situation is much different now and I am happy for it. So it is also true for me that childhood was a peculiar time where there was often a lot of friction between the people (i.e. kids) in the way they treat each other. If not you, then at least I had that with some people then without whom I can’t imagine the life I would have today.

It is an evolutionary process I feel, where people adapt to protect each other’s vulnerabilities thereby enhancing longevity and happiness.

That’s how it’s been for me so far anyway.

-Tanmay